Wednesday 24 September 2014
Final Things: WHAT NEXT?
Final Things: WHAT NEXT?: I sat wondering what next after the sad and perplexing demise of my dear friend Reg......what next? Last Sabbath I heard a sermon that shook...
WHAT NEXT?
I sat wondering what next after the sad and perplexing demise of my dear friend Reg......what next? Last Sabbath I heard a sermon that shook me out of my stupor....THE PLACE! By Pastor Munene Mwangi....Where did this one come from now? The guy preached with so much gusto I was almost jumping from my chair!!! I was so fired up coz the whole week after the death and interment of my sister I was asking God - "So?" Silence was it until Saturday, Friday night I had asked Jesus "Please let me hear a sermon that will give me an answer". And then this sermon-THE PLACE
Where is the place you are at? What is God asking you to do? God had told Modes and Joshua too that THE PLACE they were standing on was holy ground. Was it the spot on which they were standing on that was holy or the final realization of what God wanted them to do? Wow, that got me thinking, and my creative juices as Reg would say started flowing....did it take her death to finally bring me to THE PLACE? I now know so. My place of ministry is now with the single girls, teenagers and young people, who I do not want to make the same mistakes I made. From dating to marriage to separation, all these have been learning points for me. It is said only a fool learns from there own mistakes, a wise man learns from the mistakes of others.
And so THE PLACE I have come to, is a place of knowing what God wants me to do. I know some may say I am washing dirty linen, yes but let me wash mine to save someone's dirty laundry. I think some of us have been called out to speak about our situations that others may see we are real people. I used to tell Reg that we are the ones not afraid to talk. SO we have to talk, by the way God blessed me with words heh! I can talk for hours!! I can relate to the likes of Joyce Meyer, Yuanita Bynum amongst others...women who speak about their life's journey and the victory Christ has given them. AMEN
So BROKEN RIBS and TEEN WALK are babies born out my experinces.
By the way my book THE BURIAL WILL NOT HOLD, still continues to be written and now with more fire, I have to complete it!! Though there seems to be a pause.
Where is the place you are at? What is God asking you to do? God had told Modes and Joshua too that THE PLACE they were standing on was holy ground. Was it the spot on which they were standing on that was holy or the final realization of what God wanted them to do? Wow, that got me thinking, and my creative juices as Reg would say started flowing....did it take her death to finally bring me to THE PLACE? I now know so. My place of ministry is now with the single girls, teenagers and young people, who I do not want to make the same mistakes I made. From dating to marriage to separation, all these have been learning points for me. It is said only a fool learns from there own mistakes, a wise man learns from the mistakes of others.
And so THE PLACE I have come to, is a place of knowing what God wants me to do. I know some may say I am washing dirty linen, yes but let me wash mine to save someone's dirty laundry. I think some of us have been called out to speak about our situations that others may see we are real people. I used to tell Reg that we are the ones not afraid to talk. SO we have to talk, by the way God blessed me with words heh! I can talk for hours!! I can relate to the likes of Joyce Meyer, Yuanita Bynum amongst others...women who speak about their life's journey and the victory Christ has given them. AMEN
So BROKEN RIBS and TEEN WALK are babies born out my experinces.
By the way my book THE BURIAL WILL NOT HOLD, still continues to be written and now with more fire, I have to complete it!! Though there seems to be a pause.
Wednesday 17 September 2014
YOU HAVE A DATE, ROSE
My sister Reg meant that when you are going to church, you had a date with Jesus, and so you have to have a complete makeover. So every Sunday for her and every Sabbath for me, we made sure we had our best on, complete with flawless skin-thanks to liquid foundation and powder. For those who wonder why for me going to church is a ritual taken seriously.
And when back to the house later we would share what we learnt, from the sermon and everything else in between. And so today as I go to Holy Family Basilica for the funeral mass of this angel, I truly have a date!
It will be solemn mass for my sister but it will be a time also to release every bitterness and anger that I have right now. Reg may be gone, but her legacy will leave on, in her son Richard, whom she earnestly prayed for that he will be a young man with respect an honor for God and for mankind. My prayer is that he will have a stable place to grow and be established in the fear and knowledge of his mother's Lord and Savior Jesus Christ of Nazareth.
PEACE ROSE, PEACE
And when back to the house later we would share what we learnt, from the sermon and everything else in between. And so today as I go to Holy Family Basilica for the funeral mass of this angel, I truly have a date!
It will be solemn mass for my sister but it will be a time also to release every bitterness and anger that I have right now. Reg may be gone, but her legacy will leave on, in her son Richard, whom she earnestly prayed for that he will be a young man with respect an honor for God and for mankind. My prayer is that he will have a stable place to grow and be established in the fear and knowledge of his mother's Lord and Savior Jesus Christ of Nazareth.
PEACE ROSE, PEACE
Tuesday 16 September 2014
AND FINALLY OUR DREAM CAR
So we had this dream of cars.....Reg dreamt driving a Prado, I said "You will be arrested by cops thinking you're a teenager who stole her dad's car, you are too tiny for a Prado and it is too masculine, you need a feminine car...like a Honda CRV" That was in 2010. My dream car has been a CRV Honda for as long as I remember!! So after much talking over coffee and cake, I convinced her to my side, and a deal was made-When she buys a car it will be a blue CRV. At that moment I just told her from the blues that I will then be rich enough to purchase her current car-a Corolla, then later buy my own Blood red Honda to signify the blood of Jesus. We laughed it off. So she once went to a car bazaar to check them out, and told me "By the way the CRV just winked at me like it belongs to me" Laughter again. Cos every time we met we asked when God is going to open her door to buy her car as I buy her old one. That now will not happen, now God has just to bless me with a new Honda CRV.We even knew the prices of every new one that appeared, until we told God "eh how long are we to wait?"
Ecclesiastes 3:11
Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God's work from beginning to end.
JUST A MINUTE-REG
Okay so I was to continue the last profound message from Reg...The year is 2010 you texted (your calls were rare and only when you wanted to pray with me or sing a song) ....Hey Rose please take your CV (which by the way she had done for me so professionally) to Maureen Nafula, she needs workers NOW!! Before I could think, Maureen called "Hi Rose this Maureen Nafula, Regina told me you were looking for a job (was I?), well I have a vacancy in this new project I need people to do some research" Huh??? Did I hear right? Yes I did. My heart was fluttering and my heart beating so fast and loud, I think Maureen could hear it!
Well I did take my CV to NHIF building and met Maureen, who by the way we had worked with at KEMSA. She had this project with Rockefeller foundation. So IHPMR (Institute of Health Policy Marketing and Research), here I come. I begun work the next day - really? My angel had done this one too. And did I mention that for the 2 years I stayed with Reg, she paid me Heheheheheeee, may be let me not mention how much, "This will help you in moving around" is all she said. And I thought it was for one month, she did the same the next month ...and the next...and for two years.
Within 4 months of IHPMR....."Reg, you know I now think I will move to my own house" She never said much, only she knew that I had nothing to move with, and so "You can take my old TV, my old curtains (I had stitched her new ones) I know how to do that, - and here is so much to boost you" I can still hear this angelic voice. And so come January 2011 I moved to my own 2 bedroom apartment, And she escorted me to the house and we had a mini celebration. And now we were a few miles apart but we were still friends.
2 years down the line....IHPMR wound down the project.....and once again Angel to the rescue, this time I decided I have something in my hands like the rod of Moses, our prayer was that God will bless the work of my hands, but can you imagine as I was starting up, things were tough and so Reg set up for me a standing order of so much, every month religiously this amount was in my account by the 2nd of every month.
Last month, Reg sent me a text saying "my sister KRA have just discovered some taxes I have not remitted so this month will be the last for this standing order, but May God-our God will open up a greater door for you". My text back -"Reg, you have already done so much for me, may God remember your sacrifice of giving". Did I understand what that meant? No. I am left wondering, as she now ready to fly back to heaven? I know some people will say the dead are asleep-I know that too, she is asleep-but just maybe or perhaps she was just and angel sent to me for such a time as that!
Reg, for sure I am thoroughly blown off, even I cannot do what you did, but then maybe God wanted me to learn from you, that yes, I too, can be an angel to another BROKEN RIB.
Well I did take my CV to NHIF building and met Maureen, who by the way we had worked with at KEMSA. She had this project with Rockefeller foundation. So IHPMR (Institute of Health Policy Marketing and Research), here I come. I begun work the next day - really? My angel had done this one too. And did I mention that for the 2 years I stayed with Reg, she paid me Heheheheheeee, may be let me not mention how much, "This will help you in moving around" is all she said. And I thought it was for one month, she did the same the next month ...and the next...and for two years.
Within 4 months of IHPMR....."Reg, you know I now think I will move to my own house" She never said much, only she knew that I had nothing to move with, and so "You can take my old TV, my old curtains (I had stitched her new ones) I know how to do that, - and here is so much to boost you" I can still hear this angelic voice. And so come January 2011 I moved to my own 2 bedroom apartment, And she escorted me to the house and we had a mini celebration. And now we were a few miles apart but we were still friends.
2 years down the line....IHPMR wound down the project.....and once again Angel to the rescue, this time I decided I have something in my hands like the rod of Moses, our prayer was that God will bless the work of my hands, but can you imagine as I was starting up, things were tough and so Reg set up for me a standing order of so much, every month religiously this amount was in my account by the 2nd of every month.
Last month, Reg sent me a text saying "my sister KRA have just discovered some taxes I have not remitted so this month will be the last for this standing order, but May God-our God will open up a greater door for you". My text back -"Reg, you have already done so much for me, may God remember your sacrifice of giving". Did I understand what that meant? No. I am left wondering, as she now ready to fly back to heaven? I know some people will say the dead are asleep-I know that too, she is asleep-but just maybe or perhaps she was just and angel sent to me for such a time as that!
Reg, for sure I am thoroughly blown off, even I cannot do what you did, but then maybe God wanted me to learn from you, that yes, I too, can be an angel to another BROKEN RIB.
Monday 15 September 2014
My Friend, My sister, My angel-A Tribute
Tears alone cannot express what I feel right now...I have been angry at God, I have cried, questioned...even begged God to return her soul to her body- Lazarus' style, I wanted a 4 days late miracle....nothing happened. Silence..tears..more heart wrenching tears on Sunday as I prepared to go meet her mother
Reg, I will speak in present tense. What can I say about you?? I may not be given opportunity to say this, but as you used text saying "shout it from the roof tops!!" I am now prepared to shout!!!! To know that I will not see you smile again, I saw your picture at mum's place and my tears flowed once again, did you just say go on? Yes- I will try to go on-without you? Yeah, and "our" plans, gosh what was our plan for this year? -To get ourself husbands in Jesus name, I didn't know that you will get yours before me...The Husband of the single girls and the widows. A Husband of husbands, the King of kings and the Lord of lords-God himself was your husband and mine.
As single "girls" we have been accountable to each other, committed to our marriage vows and what the Bible says, the "Thus says the Lord" as you would put it, hahahhaaaaa, we laughed then we would pull put our big bibles and say, what does God say about re-marriage again? and then we said it was not fair that "thus says the Lord" It was very funny, and true we remained true to our vows...till death do us part. So you have gone to sleep in the Lord..he is the great husband. I am left, mourning for you my dear angel. For what you have been to my life and my children. Reg, what can I say?
#tearswellingup Let me continue in the midst of the tars... I can hardly see this screen.
So where do I begin? I met you in 2005, petit lady swinging on the corridors of KEMSA huh..did I ever imagine you will become my Friend like this? one who has stuck closer than a brother? No!! To say I was intimidated is not right but I thought wow what a swagging girl!- I am never intimidated by the way. So I did my casual job for 3 months and at your recommendation I was hired as Admin Assistant for the Consultants at KEMSA. That is when "our" looooooooong journey begun.
Soon we were on talking terms and I got to know you better, even establishing that you were married to my cousin, talk of coincidence!! Little did I know that 4 years later, you would be my little angel God sent to rescue me. When my own story changed and in August 2009 I was homeless without a job with no money, you came strutting into my house at Yaya centre, with 2 bags. "Rose, it is over....come with me to my house for a day, 2 days, a week, a month or...or ..whatever-let's go" The hugs amidst tears-I packed my clothes and whtever else to Kilelesha, Delux Plaza falt B5, here we come.....what we thought was two weeks ended up to be 2 years!!!!!! What! that long? And I never saw any ill feelings or "madharau" as Kenyans would say. 2 years...wah. My kids visited every now and then. There was always cake baked for them...were you a real person or an angel?
Time and time again we prayed, we danced (to praise songs) late into the night, we fasted, we prayed some more. Reg, did our prayers get answered? Yes always.....through it all God was faithful. I drove your car every visiting days to visit my children in their various schools....sometimes you said "haiya this time you have to visit the two at a go? Then just take the car, I will go to church by matatu" I looked at you "What?" and yes I drove your car to the 2 schools, and Richard would came along. The food, the shopping, the pocket money...all came from you my angel.
How many times did I pinch you to see if you are real or you would fly away, then I will just confirm and say "O she was an angel sent for this time, and she has flown back to heaven" Funny thing is that every one I shared this stories with wanted to meet you, but none has met you. ahhahahhaaa I can laugh at this because none of them can prove if you were real now.How sad- I had wanted them to see you for real.
We were both writing "our" books, mine-THE BURIAL WILL NOT HOLD!. you used to ask where I got such funny titles. And yours was almost done but had no title- I was to give one of my funny titles after I read it and corrected stuff....mmhh now? I may never get to give you a funny title. May be I would have the title ANGELS ARE REAL I cannot think of a funny title now my mind for now has lost its funny side. Well, you were to write the forward to my burial will not hold book-did you? I hope it will be found somewhere, but even if not I will try to write what I thought you could have said- I knew you too well, maybe I will do that justice.
Then "our" ministry to single people. We were to begin talking about holiness as you wait for another chance at marriage. I was coming to drop a bombshell of a name this week-then you are not there. So here goes that name I was bringing "BROKEN RIBS" I can hear you laughing "Rose!!! What? Broken ribs!!!??" You are tickled...yes we were the broken ribs, because we were the "bone of my bones" ribs taken from the side of someone who broke their vows, ....made whole by the blood atoning sacrifice of Jesus, he has mended us therefore we were to talk to other broken ribs or breaking ones and tell them God is still their husband, their lover, their friend.The Lord who turned our mourning into dancing, beauty for ashes, gold from stones.
Well dear Reg (that was what I always called you) my kids call you Aunty Reg....they have cried with me and for you my sister...from Sid to Joyce...and in between...Danielle and my own Richard bid as you called my Richard, they all will miss you dearly. But 2 years ago we had a pact didn't we that for all you did for me my children will take care of the small Richard-they will don't you worry about that, our prayers were what? That God will make our children greater than we are. You were Director ICT USIU- Richard will be president!!
Sleep in perfect peace, till we meet on that beautiful resurrection morning-which now I know is very close. And YES!! I will be there coz now more than ever I continue to work out my salvation with more fear and trembling.
This will make a chapter of that book...to be continued
Reg, I will speak in present tense. What can I say about you?? I may not be given opportunity to say this, but as you used text saying "shout it from the roof tops!!" I am now prepared to shout!!!! To know that I will not see you smile again, I saw your picture at mum's place and my tears flowed once again, did you just say go on? Yes- I will try to go on-without you? Yeah, and "our" plans, gosh what was our plan for this year? -To get ourself husbands in Jesus name, I didn't know that you will get yours before me...The Husband of the single girls and the widows. A Husband of husbands, the King of kings and the Lord of lords-God himself was your husband and mine.
As single "girls" we have been accountable to each other, committed to our marriage vows and what the Bible says, the "Thus says the Lord" as you would put it, hahahhaaaaa, we laughed then we would pull put our big bibles and say, what does God say about re-marriage again? and then we said it was not fair that "thus says the Lord" It was very funny, and true we remained true to our vows...till death do us part. So you have gone to sleep in the Lord..he is the great husband. I am left, mourning for you my dear angel. For what you have been to my life and my children. Reg, what can I say?
#tearswellingup Let me continue in the midst of the tars... I can hardly see this screen.
So where do I begin? I met you in 2005, petit lady swinging on the corridors of KEMSA huh..did I ever imagine you will become my Friend like this? one who has stuck closer than a brother? No!! To say I was intimidated is not right but I thought wow what a swagging girl!- I am never intimidated by the way. So I did my casual job for 3 months and at your recommendation I was hired as Admin Assistant for the Consultants at KEMSA. That is when "our" looooooooong journey begun.
Soon we were on talking terms and I got to know you better, even establishing that you were married to my cousin, talk of coincidence!! Little did I know that 4 years later, you would be my little angel God sent to rescue me. When my own story changed and in August 2009 I was homeless without a job with no money, you came strutting into my house at Yaya centre, with 2 bags. "Rose, it is over....come with me to my house for a day, 2 days, a week, a month or...or ..whatever-let's go" The hugs amidst tears-I packed my clothes and whtever else to Kilelesha, Delux Plaza falt B5, here we come.....what we thought was two weeks ended up to be 2 years!!!!!! What! that long? And I never saw any ill feelings or "madharau" as Kenyans would say. 2 years...wah. My kids visited every now and then. There was always cake baked for them...were you a real person or an angel?
Time and time again we prayed, we danced (to praise songs) late into the night, we fasted, we prayed some more. Reg, did our prayers get answered? Yes always.....through it all God was faithful. I drove your car every visiting days to visit my children in their various schools....sometimes you said "haiya this time you have to visit the two at a go? Then just take the car, I will go to church by matatu" I looked at you "What?" and yes I drove your car to the 2 schools, and Richard would came along. The food, the shopping, the pocket money...all came from you my angel.
How many times did I pinch you to see if you are real or you would fly away, then I will just confirm and say "O she was an angel sent for this time, and she has flown back to heaven" Funny thing is that every one I shared this stories with wanted to meet you, but none has met you. ahhahahhaaa I can laugh at this because none of them can prove if you were real now.How sad- I had wanted them to see you for real.
We were both writing "our" books, mine-THE BURIAL WILL NOT HOLD!. you used to ask where I got such funny titles. And yours was almost done but had no title- I was to give one of my funny titles after I read it and corrected stuff....mmhh now? I may never get to give you a funny title. May be I would have the title ANGELS ARE REAL I cannot think of a funny title now my mind for now has lost its funny side. Well, you were to write the forward to my burial will not hold book-did you? I hope it will be found somewhere, but even if not I will try to write what I thought you could have said- I knew you too well, maybe I will do that justice.
Then "our" ministry to single people. We were to begin talking about holiness as you wait for another chance at marriage. I was coming to drop a bombshell of a name this week-then you are not there. So here goes that name I was bringing "BROKEN RIBS" I can hear you laughing "Rose!!! What? Broken ribs!!!??" You are tickled...yes we were the broken ribs, because we were the "bone of my bones" ribs taken from the side of someone who broke their vows, ....made whole by the blood atoning sacrifice of Jesus, he has mended us therefore we were to talk to other broken ribs or breaking ones and tell them God is still their husband, their lover, their friend.The Lord who turned our mourning into dancing, beauty for ashes, gold from stones.
Well dear Reg (that was what I always called you) my kids call you Aunty Reg....they have cried with me and for you my sister...from Sid to Joyce...and in between...Danielle and my own Richard bid as you called my Richard, they all will miss you dearly. But 2 years ago we had a pact didn't we that for all you did for me my children will take care of the small Richard-they will don't you worry about that, our prayers were what? That God will make our children greater than we are. You were Director ICT USIU- Richard will be president!!
Sleep in perfect peace, till we meet on that beautiful resurrection morning-which now I know is very close. And YES!! I will be there coz now more than ever I continue to work out my salvation with more fear and trembling.
This will make a chapter of that book...to be continued
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